lament

I’ve mentioned twice already that my church is working through the Old Testament book of Lamentations right now. It has been challenging for me. It has stirred up a lot of emotions and struggles. It has come at a good time…a time of me wrestling with who God is to me, how He is directing me, and what He is calling me to do.

Those aren’t easy questions with which to grapple. And they don’t come with easy answers.

I’m in a period of refining, I think, and I’m kicking and screaming and making all manner of shit-headed mistakes in the process. I want things to be clear, but God sometimes wraps Himself in uncertainty so I’m forced to trust. I want things to be right now, but God sometimes seems silent in making my prayers reality so I’m forced to recognize that HE is all I need.

I wrote a song this morning to remind myself that God’s faithfulness never ends…His love never changes…and, somehow, even with my despicable past and my laughable attempts at righteousness, He calls me his.

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